Mommy Dearest

This week I set myself and my hubby for a three day weekend.  We decided to go over to Tulsa to do some shopping any maybe go over to the new Hard Rock Cafe Hotel and Casino and see what all the buzz about is over there!  Unfortunately I have to go shopping for clothes for my mother’s wedding!  I don't really dress up that much mostly due to the fact I don't really do anything outside of the home.   I usually just wear my athletic pants and a t-shirt.  I was thinking some slacks and a blue shirt (the wedding is navy and silver).  I was thinking trying to find some nice tan slacks, I prefer black but then I would have to get black shoes I would never wear.  This way I can get a pair of docks, and I am sure I'll wear those around. 

My mother wants me to do a reading but I have no idea what I am going to do.  Do I want to make something up?  Or find something else?  I asked if I could just sing, but she said no...Something about me sucking?  Thanks Mom!  Maybe something along the lines of "Love is like an onion...." oh wait that was 'An Ogre is like an onion.'   Maybe I should get my quotes together... "YOU RAISE ME UP SO I CAN STAND ON MOUNTAINS!"  Stop throwing the tomato's I know I suck, go somewhere else!

Maybe I should go along the lines of "Well it is so awesome that I am getting a step dad!  I always wanted a step dad that was two years older than me!  Cheers!"  Oh yea did I forget to mention that he was only two years older than me and my mom is a total cougar?  Oops yea I have a few issues when it comes to my new step-daddy.  A big one was that he dated my younger sister before my mom.  How uncomfortable is that ceremony going to be?

Maybe I should go in just my sweats and t-shirt and tennis shoes, do you think they will notice?  Prolly not a good idea?  I might get taken out of the will.  Prolly was already wasn't I?  I wonder if he has mommy issues and she has children abandonment issues.  I wonder if I will need therapy after this.  I wonder if I just need to go to therapy.

But the wedding does provide me a chance to miss work on an actual Saturday and Sunday, rather than my original days off Tuesdays and Wednesdays.  (Did you know in Microsoft Word it will spell out the words of the days of week and months for you, but not Wednesday.  To me that is the hardest word in the world to remember how to spell.  I think it is the D and the N being next to each other like that.) 

I wonder how my mother would react if I told her I broke it off with the hubby to have an affair with someone older than her?  Ha, maybe I should even make it even a woman to top it off! I think she’s too healthy to have a heart attack…I think.